On Transcendent Sex

I mention a few episodes of transcendent sex in The Sacred Female, but I did not know what they were called until I read Transcendent Sex.  My descriptions there came from experience.

 Dr. Jenny Wade’s book , Transcendent Sex,[1] gives a detailed description from 91 different people who experienced this phenomenon.  Here, we leave the realm of physical pleasure and sex.  It is truly a mind-altering experience, implying a significant change in our brain chemistry, and our lives.  Sexual love is for some, simply a pleasurable pathway to this ecstasy, although actual intercourse may not be necessary.  There are many forms of transcendent sex.   These are altered states of consciousness, due to a change in brain chemistry, which may also be accomplished by years of ascetic living and meditation or with drugs such as LSD and other methods.  We may think of them as “stepping into another world.”

 As our consciousness grows, we may think of it as living in another world, while still connected to this one.  One cannot help but wonder if we treated our beloved mates as sacred, it would work for us?

Dr. Wade categorizes many different types of transcendent sex and different experiences within the types.  The following list is excerpted from her book only to show the many different types occurring to individuals.  Since this survey was limited to 91 respondents, and the list is but a “headline,” her book is recommended reading for further information on this subject.

First she hits is with the bad news:

  • Sexual techniques and mechanics may have no bearing on transcendence. 
  • Transcendence may occur between couples without sexual congress.
  • Orgasm is not a causal factor.  It may occur without, before, during or after orgasm, and orgasm becomes a non-event.
  • Sexual abuse is not a causal factor.
  • Transcendence may occur in the later years of a marriage or on a one-night stand.
  • It “transcends” religious beliefs and sexual orientation.
  • It is not a guarantee of “true love,” nor should it be a goal in sexual love.  It is just something that happens, sometimes.

She relates the various experiences as follows:

Fireworks, Light and Electricity: stars—lightening—emersion in various colored lights— golden lights shooting upward—sensations of heat—actual elevated body temperature (105 F).  Also, a man reported tingling sensations in his hands and feet for weeks afterwards, interfering with his sleep.

 Kundalini:  Science defines the Kundalini as, “nonodinary percepts of energy fields in the absence of any discernible stimulus, especially sensations of heat, subtle force fields, light and liquefaction, congruent with descriptions in various mystical traditions.”[2]  Kundalini is also the name of the “sacred snake,” coiled near the base of the spine, or the Serpent Goddess, in the sacral region.  In English, the experience is like a hot snake uncoiling up your spinal column, plus!  Kundalini has a multitude of spiritual meanings and here we only focus on the sexual experience.

                                              The Spinal Column


Here is one place where the insertion points between Th-10 and S-2 of the various nerve pathways come into play.  The Kundalini experience may be a rhythmic, cycling flow of additional neural impulses at the various insertion points along the spinal column, working their way up the spine.  As we are focused on transmitting love to our beloved, thinking of nothing else, all kinds of wondrous things happen!  However, the Kundalini can be extremely painful if, as we surmise, there is an excess of this energy trying to cycle and flow.  It is as if a “log jam” of neural impulses occurs at these points on the spinal column.  It can also lead to madness!

Deity Presence:  angels—the presence of God (the Third in the room)—visitations of the deceased.

Gaia:  feeling of oneness with blades of grass or flowing like sap in trees—magical connections with plants or animals—sounds of silence as a permeating feeling.  One man reported a transmission of intelligence from a dolphin with whom he had been lovingly playing.  It was a red beam of light focused on the center of his forehead, pineal gland, he described as a “virtual transmission implant that could code a 60 gig, 60 bit DVD ROM streaming video that portrayed all of evolution.”[3]   (The occurrence was years before the web and only after the web did he have words to describe it.)

Trespasso:  seeing extra faces on your lover—seeing a sequence of other faces, or people—angelic or demonic faces—spirits trespassing into partner’s body, obscuring the face—animal faces, usually bear, wolf or bird.  (I speculate this is the source of many animal headed archeological artifacts: totems, figurines, petroglyphs, etc.)

Merging:  becoming one with—filling with the others energy—spiritual awakening.  Usually occurring with deep love.  Sometimes in long term relationships.

Shapeshifting: animal possession—sense of being an animal with all the attributes.  One woman saw her limbs grow, her body hair grow as she became a wolf with no recollection of humanness, but later was able to recall her wolf-ness.

Transport: out of body, where the body is seen objectively (generally afterwards)—spatial dislocation—becoming an animal or plant—transport to another time and/or place.

Past lives:  who you were, when in that experience or past lives intrude into current friendships.

Nothingness: a sense of nothingness—dissolving—a loss of boundaries—nothingness AND everything-ness—no sense of self.

Deity uno:  being one with God—into the white light of God—dissolving into God—merged into the fires of God—felt alive—apparitions of the dead—residual “sensitivity” or ability to see the essence of others.

These are but a few of the experiences discussed in much more detail in Dr. Wade’s book.  When we don’t know transcendence is a possible outcome of a sexual encounter, regardless of how ecstatic it may be, the experience can be frightening.  Now, you know.  In the presence of fear, these experiences can be interpreted as “bad trips,” or even “evil” depending on the individual’s belief system.

Generally speaking, transcendent sex can lead to positive spiritual outcomes: instantly or years later.  Not always.  There is one story of a former Catholic priest who was psychologically destroyed by successive transcendent sexual experiences.[4]   “A transcendent experience can tap into unhealthy complexes and magnify them.”[5]    One woman had an extra-marital affair with a cross-country colleague, ending in her divorce and a psychotic break, thanks to transcendent sex.[6]   This is an altered state of consciousness and not to be trifled with!  Dr. Wade also warns that many western “gurus” simply use their addiction to transcendent sex as a mechanism for seduction.  There is a strong spiritual discipline that accompanies most teaching for this form of divine enlightenment.  On the other hand, sometimes it just happens.

If any of this has happened to you, please feel free to comment and please tell others about this blog.

Copyright Art Noble 2011


[1] Transcendent Sex, Jenny Wade, PhD, Pocket Books, New York, NY, 2004

 [2] ibid. p.273

[3] ibid. p. 67

[4] ibid. p. 223

[5] ibid. p. 212

[6] ibid. p. 221

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21 Responses to “On Transcendent Sex”

  1. Carlo Ami Says:

    I would not consider the 7 bulleted ideas early in the article as “bad news.” These things are just possibilities.

    And the article’s last big paragraph may plant a not-too-happy seed in the minds of those who have no clue about transcendent sex. Some folks will go into fear mode when reading about the priest who was “psycholigically destroyed.”

    Great information here, yet the emphasis might be added about prudence and trusting the process with one’s lover.

    • thesacredfemale Says:

      This is excerpeted from a draft of my new book (in progress). Trust, acceptance, respect, etc,. are both overtly and covertly placed throughout the book. My thinking here is, do not persue transcendent sex. Just love and let it come to you. “Bad news” is an attempt at humor. Too weak. Thank you.

      As I read the story about the priest, I wondered what he was doing fooling around anyway? Perhaps his guilt…?

  2. Carlo Ami Says:

    I think we writers tend to have a different sense of humor than most people. It’s all good.

    Best wishes with your book. I take it that you are intending to go beyond David Deida-type work. Please let me know when you publish.

    I have known two ex-priests, one of whom married. The shift in both their energies was amazing. Tough to comprehend what it would be like to stuff sexual energy for 25 or 30 years and then to dive fully into it.

    • thesacredfemale Says:

      The concept is both love and sex are energy. Love is all around us and works when we open ourselves to it. Sexual energy is quite real, a function of anatomical structures both mentally and physically stimulated. I view love as “light energy” and we are the prisms that refract it. As Newton noted, when we screen a segment of the prism, not all the colors come through. The portion of the prism we have screened the most is that involving sexual love. This slows or prohibits the “mental” stimulation. It is all a head game civilization has played with us for the past 5000 years or so. I’ve traced the history of a lot of it. It’s been a heck of a trip!

  3. albaneiler1221 Says:

    Transcendent love occurs with most people spontaneously and without conscious thought. My first experience was a total shock, especially since it happened when my partner in the experience was 1,144 miles away at the time. Since that time, it has occurred both with and without bodies, with three partners, total, in my experience. You are correct that orgasm has little to do with the awesome (used in the traditional sense of the word, not the current popular vernacular) exchange of energy, combination of those energies and convergence with even more energy. It is amazing.

    Tell me, have you experienced this yourself or just studied the phenonmenom?

  4. thesacredfemale Says:

    Aactually, it was a transcendent sexual experience that got me into my research on the subject. Although “love” is not necessary for transcendence to occur, I certainly was when it happened! And yes, it is awesome!

    There is training available with Tantra and other disciplines, so that transcendence may be experienced more frequently, But, I’m just going to stick with love.

  5. albaneiler1221 Says:

    I have researched Tantra and more. Since it was mere happenstance that allowed me into the experience, I think I shall contin”When all other rights are taken away, the right of rebellion is made perfect.” – Thomas Paineue to follow my own path for a time.

    I was certainly in love with all three men when this happened. While I have heard love needn’t be involved, I am not so sure. This is such a spiritual experience, I am of the belief that love must be involved, at least to have felt the experience as intensely as it was felt.

    What do you think? And I would love to hear of your experience with this fascinating experience.

    And I shall stick with love as well. Seems prudent.

  6. thesacredfemale Says:

    I agree! Stick with love. It always works in our best interst, whether we like it or not!

  7. albaneiler1221 Says:

    Since we are speaking of love here, then, and not sex (there is a major difference in “having sex” and “making love”), do you believe you can be “in love” with more than one person? Love is something that we can give to all people at any time, but being “in love” should be and is more discriminate. Is is possible, then, to be in love with more than one person at a time?

    And don’t you ever sleep?

  8. thesacredfemale Says:

    On the subject of androgny or polygmy, I have no experience. I cannot answer. And, come on, isn’t one enough? For having sex, perhaps not. But for being in love, I think one is sufficient.

    I was up too late last night and will pay for it today!

  9. albaneiler1221 Says:

    I’m not talking about at the same time, not all living together and not having an encounter at the same time.. But it is possible to have more than one, ok, two, of these transcendent relationships. I speak from experience.

    I was up too late as well, or rather, too early. I am about to take a nap.

  10. thesacredfemale Says:

    Obviously, it would appear that way. You did.

    I agree. Nap time!

  11. Joyful Bioluminescence « Thesacredfemale’s Blog Says:

    […] we see in ancient carvings from around the world arose from a transcendent sexual experience called Trespasso.  But, who […]

  12. thesacredfemale Says:

    Unfortunately, Canadian diamond wholesale, your comment did not come through, only the web site which is spam. The comment I saw in my email was beautiful and right on target. Can you re-do it please?>

  13. Chantale Reve Says:

    I used to experience — although not of late (sob) — random transcendent *sensual* experiences whether with a lover who often seemed to have an aura about him, or in solitude while surrounded by nature (plants and animals — not human animals) or during effortless writing in my studio. As for the latter, I’m referring to those pre-dawn writing sessions where the fingers are gliding on and tapping at the keys on my keyboard as if a higher power is dictating character, tone, plot, dialogue, etc., into my brain while I’m just a medium. Those transcendent sensual experiences must have led to the writing of a short story about a woman whose former male lover — but first and only boyfriend — seems supernatural and has disappeared. I want to be clear that the male character is not modeled on my former real-life lover with whom I shared (unbeknownst to him) several transcendent sexual incidents as well as non-sexual transcendent experiences.

    Here, I write “must have” because I wasn’t aware of the origin until after I wrote the piece. In fact, when I return to my short story, it’s as if I didn’t write it, in that the “voice” is vastly different than anything else I’d written before or have since. Just as that fictional story seemed to originate from a deeper place — i.e., my unconscious via a divine connection (i.e., God, the Creator, etc.) — the mysterious antagonist in my short story seemed to: 1) appear out of nowhere and float into the protagonist’s life; 2) have the qualities of a predatory bird; 3) have a way of touching her (with or without actual sex) that transformed her into a more-powerful entity; 4) disappear, suddenly, not only from the protag’s life but (seemingly) from life itself; 5) “reappear” as pure energy (sometimes light, sometimes dark); and 6) finally (or, finally in the present life [form] of the protag) beckon the former lover to commit suicide by drowning.

    Now, my past transcendent sensual experiences were positive, so I’m unaware of the psychological mechanics of how the short story came to be. It’s confounding for writers to realize, even (in this case) several years after writing a work, that hidden places in the mind which possibly reverberate from past transcendent sensual (or sensory?) and/or sexual experiences can emit bursts of energy that take the form of characters and characters’ beliefs. My experience with this phenomenon (with revelation occurring through the creative writing process, and especially with most of the writing happening between 3 and 6 a.m. over the course of years) has enlightened me — though, no way as “heavy” as Buddhism’s Siddartha leading an ascetic life and experiencing enlightenment — on a daily basis where someone’s most harsh words and acts against me get turned (almost magically) into positive currents so that I can’t really get angry anymore.

    Turning off negative media on television also has helped me retain these spontaneous endorphins. I also wonder if the absence of sex during the entire “conception,” incubation and birth of my short story somehow connected me to the Universe in the way that the aforementioned transcendent sensual experiences did. I want to be clear, here, that by writing about daily endorphins, I don’t mean that I experience daily euphoria. Rather, because I’m an artist who, like many other artists (be they literary, visual, performing, culinary, etc.), can get into a zone where I hit a flow and then run with it, I’m wondering if my past transcendent sensual experiences changed my brain chemistry (for the better) irreversibly and permanently.

    • thesacredfemale Says:

      I had similar, but I don’t think as intense,experiences in my writing. The beautiful thing about us humans (or is it “we humans?”) is our genetic uniqueness which I believe influences our journeys into transcendence. Of course, just because I believe it, doesn’t make it a “fact.” The sequence of your story makes perfect sense to me, but I don’t always rely on reason. (Big smile.)

      • Chantale Reve Says:

        What I like, at the present moment, is that *you* totally are making sense to me! (Bigger smile) P.S. You were correct in writing “about us” [humans] because the objective pronoun is needed after the preposition “about.” 😉

  14. Deanna Says:

    Thank you for the fantastic study you’ve done. I was so confused and torn about being thrust inbetween the two worlds. Now I have a better understanding. Many years Ago I looked online to see if anyone had a similar expierience but didnt come across anything that was close enough. A couple years ago I looked again & although each person has a different version of events, their are many bits and pieces of expierience that fit what I have had. Mostly nothingness, floating above, disappearing, euphoria, a cleansing feeling, complete & whole, majestic, colorless, excess intensity, blessed etc…. Maybe people held off so long because its hard to admit you are obsolete & everything at the same time & that you can truly be one- mind & body as one solid mass. Nothing separating the two. None of it makes sense, yet it all makes perfect sense to some. My first time, I cried after, I was exaughsted and I felt lost. I didnt understand where I went and why I went there And I hoped I didnt say or do anything embarrasing within my loss of time. I knew I was yelling out in pleasure, but I could not hear my own words. Now I have even more intense episodes of trascendency but because I know Im not going crazy, I can embrace it instead of fear it. I still cry occasionally after but not from fear, its the emotional overload that is sometimes to much. The intense connection between me & my guy & me and my whole being can be very overwhelming. Thanks for bringing your study and story to the world. Deanna

    • thesacredfemale Says:

      Deanna, thank you! I believe because we are each genetically unique, our experiences are as well unique. Though the article “categorizes” them, as you point out, many can happen at the same time. (I didn’t know what the hell was going on either, except it was awesome!) Live, love and enjoy!

  15. James Says:

    Here’s a question. What if you have experienced a “soulf***” But but the interesting part is that i was in an ambulance, strapped down. Nobody was near me other than the paramedic behind me. And now after going to several different therapists. One of them knows exactly what happened. Without me even remembering until she brought it up.

    I’m really confused and tripped out. Could use any input.

    • thesacredfemale Says:

      James, what I have learned is we may have orgasmic experiences, including transcendent ones, without sex and at the weirdest times. There are two cases in the literature of women having orgasmic experiences while brushing their teeth. Usually, the kundalini (transcendent) experience takes training, but I have a friend who had this experience sitting in her car, waiting for her children to get out of church-school. As far as I know, the “why” is up for grabs. They just happen. Know that you are not alone, but you may be very special.

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